Cheating is something that nobody wants to experience. But if a call or text from an unknown number leaves you feeling insecure, you might be wondering what steps to take next. While an emotional confrontation with your partner might be tempting, that’s not always the best way to deal with the issue. Although feeling like something is off in your relationship isn’t ideal, following these steps can help move forward while protecting the integrity of your relationship.
Assess the Situation
Before confronting your partner, take a step back and assess your situation. When you feel insecure about your relationship, it’s common to feel overwhelmed by sadness, anger, and jealousy. Taking a step back can help you rationally assess any potential red flags.
Accusing your partner of cheating without proof can ruin your relationship, especially if you’re wrong. To collect evidence of your partner’s infidelity, download a phone tracker app or perform a cheater search using GoLookUp.
With secret dating apps and messaging apps, cheaters can hide their infidelity from partners. GoLookUp’s search tool makes it easy to catch a cheating husband, wife, boyfriend, or girlfriend by simply entering their phone number. Collecting evidence will help later on if your partner denies their unfaithfulness.
Feeling like something is off in your relationship can make you feel alone, especially if you usually turn to your partner for support. Reach out to people in your life who are supportive and willing to give you honest advice—whether you want to hear it or not. Listening to the advice of close friends and family members is a mature and critical step in moving forward.
Explaining your situation to an outside party might provide insights into your relationship that you were in too deep to realize. Close friends don’t have any ulterior motives—like creating drama—and will prioritize your well-being. Creating a support group can also reduce the risk of isolating yourself or suffering in silence if your relationship comes to an end.
If you’re not sure where to turn, consider seeking professional help. Dealing with a cheating partner can make you feel crazy and a therapist will teach you valuable coping mechanisms. Speaking to a therapist can also help you rationalize the situation and jumpstart the healing process.
Confront Your Partner
Ultimately, the best way to determine whether your partner has cheated is to confront your partner. To prepare for the conversation, create a list of talking points. Note what you would like your partner to know, any suspicions you have, and how your partner’s actions made you feel. Creating a list can help you organize your thoughts and express your feelings more clearly.
Accusing your partner of cheating may seem scary, and it can be tempting to wait around for the perfect moment. However, the perfect moment to confront your partner will never happen. So instead of waiting, create the perfect moment by letting your partner know you need to talk to them.
Confronting your partner can be intimidating and uncomfortable. According to psychotherapist and relationship expert Alexa Carling, it’s important to “think of somewhere you would both feel safe so that your energies can go into communicating, feeling and being.” While a private space may help you focus on expressing your concerns, a public environment may be optimal if you’re afraid of an outburst.
Regardless of your partner’s reaction, remember that your feelings are justified. Watch your partner’s body language and stand up for yourself. If your partner denies their infidelity, provide evidence and ask for honesty.
When something feels off in your relationship, it’s easy to feel angry and insecure. If you find out your partner is cheating and decide to move forward with your relationship, setting emotional and physical boundaries can facilitate the healing process. All in all, following these steps, can help you figure out whether your partner is cheating.